Don’t Date This Guy

The previous post (Dating in Pictures) has generated the feedback that wasn’t quite expected. As you can see there are little comments there, but boy, you had to see those e-mails!

Generally I can’t judge your photos, since I am a guy and the picture of you without your shirt can generate interest only if you’re a woman with at least D-size breasts. Otherwise - I have no idea how attractive you look. On the other hand, if you look dumb - showing off that size 56 belly - I’ll be sure to let you know.

A lot of people missed a very important point of the previous post - DON’T MAKE PICTURES WITH YOU AND YOUR CAR. 90% of women will consider you either an asshole or an easy money. Either way you loose. Remember - girl look good with the car, guys look good with girls. Don’t confuse yourself there.

Popularity: 15%

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There were numbers of times when myself or my friends got puzzled by what’s written in the dating profile. There were, also, times, when we were confused as to what to write in our profiles. As you may have already guessed by now, the puzzlement by readers is caused by the puzzlement by writers.

Let’s just assume for a moment that you have a dating profile that lists your goals as “Friendship, Casual Dating,  Serious Relationship, Marriage and Kids and No Strings Relationship”. Just by expanding your visibility to all the areas of search (that’s why those categories are there in the first place) you have successfully eliminated any ability of your prospective date to see your actual goals. Is she’s looking for serious relationship - you have already scared her away with casual dating and no strings relationship. If that’s exactly what she’s looking for you turn her down by wanting marriage and kids. We can argue that with the right person everything is possible, but unless you’re Brad Pitt (i.e. cute and rich) - I doubt any girl will fall for that.

Now is the tricky part. What do you really want to put there? Whatever you think is right. Don’t waste your time on one-timers and gold-diggers if your goal is marriage, keep looking for that one and the only. If you are looking for casual encounters - leave those mom-wannabes alone.

If you are like me, and keep hanging somewhere in between - there’s hope for you too. Try to keep two profiles. Just make sure you are not using same or similar photos in them, this way you’ll keep away from those angry messages about being double-faced lying bastard.

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(This post have been intentionally left without the pictures. Think of one yourself.)

It’s year 2008 and there’s no need to remind you that almost all communications are now online. There’s also a great chance that you are trying to find your dates on the internet, on one of numerous dating web sites. That - or rather pictures on those profiles - would be the focus of our attention here.

The most common mistake almost everyone seems to make is taking a picture with something that should translate a “subliminal” message. Guys take their pictures with their supposedly hot car in the background, while girls prefer to lean heavily on party or travel photographs. Let’s look at these cases a little closer.

There’s nothing wrong in posting you picture in or around your car - IF YOU DESIGNED THE CAR YOURSELF! Otherwise the message you’re sending is basically “I am so fat/ugly/dumb that I had to put my car into the picture to make the photograph worth looking at“. Think about it for a moment. Unless you are on a hunt for a gold digger the expensive car in the background doesn’t really add anything to your profile. By the same rationale you might have took picture with your neighbour’s car, so if you think you project an image of a wealthy individual - you’re wrong.

Same kind of thought process should be applied to the pictures from parties. Just think there for a moment: if you post your pictures from your friend’s bachelor partwhere you’re surrounded with at least three almost naked strippers - you’re saying that you are unable to be in a serious relationship. If you have that macho look with a bottle of beer in your hand - it means that’s pretty much what you want to do in life. If you pose semi-naked showing off your muscles it means there’s nothing else about you but those muscles. Good for a one-night stand, but nothing more. Picture of you and similarly drunk friends - well, you got the idea.

So what’s a good pciture? Honestly - I don’t know. The picture I had on my dating profile that won me the hottest girl that was around wasn’t of a good quality. It showed me from shoulders up, the naked shoulder muscles were out, with one of my cats sitting on my hand. I wasn’t quite shaved and had a regular inquisitive look on my face. As I have found out what girls thought was something like “Well, this guy is strong - look at those muscles - but has a tender side to him, since he’s holding a cat just like he would have held a baby. Let me give him a try…” Can’t say how close to the truth all this is, after all - this was said on a date in order to get me interested, but I think you got the drift.

Of course, the picture alone won’t give you a perfect date, as it has to be YOUR picture. You also should think about what you say or write. And good luck with dating, the season is long open.

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Whenever you decide that you and your date are ready to go for something more then just couple of drinks, there’s always a dilemma as to which restaurant to choose. Pick something too simple - and she won’t be impressed. Pick something too fancy - and she’ll literally eat all your money out. Pick something too loud and you won’t be able to chit-chat. Pick something too quiet - and you won’t be able to make her laugh as hard as she can.

Although people don’t really put much thought to where to have that important second or third date, it is indeed makes sense to plan ahead. If your lunch budget just couple of lines below budget of some third-world country then you can skip next couple of paragraphs. The rest of you - read on.

First of all - make sure you can afford a full dinner at the restaurant of your choice. You don’t know that girl yet, so if she turns out to be a gold-digger or just a bitch who always orders the most expensive item on the menu - you have to have your bases covered. After all, there will be some other girl who you would want to bring here, so no reason of making a wrong impression on the staff. Second - make sure you have a backup, especially if your first choice is either an ethnic or theme restaurant; make sure the backup falls in the same pricing niche as your first choice. If your date can’t eat curry that puts away a lot of Indian and Thai places, so have some Italian or Greek spot handy. Third - make sure the restaurant of your choice takes the credit cards that you have (or you carry enough cash). It could be embarassing if they only take AmEx and all you have is Visa or MC.

It usually helps if you’ve been to the place before (unless both you and your date are food adventurers). Not so much to avoid surprises, but to have situation under control. Maybe recommend something, or ask the waiter for something that is tasty but hidden from the menu. I pull this trick on one dessert at some Japanese place - ladies almost scream in extasy after tasting that dessert, although it’s next to impossible to find it in the menu and it’s almost always sold out by the regular “dating time”.

Most importantly - know the attire for the restaurant. You want to “fall in” with the crowd around you, not so much for yourself, but for your date. Remember, women are much more conscious about how they look, so if she’s uncomfortable - it will be your fault that you brought her here. Your date may be jeopardized right from the start. So mention the place (unless it’s a surprise) and if she’s not familiar - tell her what you are wearing (or plan to wear), so she would get a clue as to what to put on herself. You’ll score more brownie points by being considerate which you (hopefully) will be able to redeem later.

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It’s about time we started talking about healthy eating. Just keep in mind - all those “two salad leaves a day” diets will get you thinner, but at what cost? No sex? No way! In order to perform well both men and women alike need to eat healthy and have enough energy to enjoy their relationship to the fullest extent. Enter ethnic foods.

Everybody knows that american food is fattening, italian food is heavy and cuban food is hot spicy. What almost everyone seem to miss is that food plays major role in your sex life. Eating right is the cornerstone of a healthy relationship. Let’s look at just one example.

Let’s say you are regularly having a heavy meal late evening chances are - your sex life isn’t at its fullest. However, if you LIKE to have heavy meals in late evening - just change the diet. Instead of sandwiches or pasta or pizza - try to eat something that would benefit you better. From Russian food assortment you can take pelmeni with sour cream. Add your favorite beer. Don’t overeat though, it’s very easy to consume so much of this tasty stuff that you won’t be able to lift yourself from the table. Sounds heavy? Watch what happens afterwards, how long you will last and what your girlfriend or wife would say next morning.

Why don’t we look at it a little closer. Pelmeni contain proteins and good carbs, sour cream contains vitamins and fats, beer contains yeast and alcohol. Every major component of healthy eating is there (and some more!), plus you are getting a good workout after it, so you suppose to burn the majority of calories from fat and carbs.

If you don’t like Russian cuisine - try Cuban, Thai, Indian or whatever else you like. Just make sure it’s not only tasty and fulfilling, but also benefits your relationship.

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Popularity: 38%

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